dekillerqueen: (Fizzle crackle)
Shelly de Killer ([personal profile] dekillerqueen) wrote2011-11-23 09:45 pm

[16 | Intercepted phone call] This sure is a post I can tell I won't regret, ever!

Mr. Greed? [Oh, hey. It's Shelly's voice. But something doesn't seem quite right...] I, I apologise for having left without warning, but... I would sincerely like your help now.

What? I figured you just went out for a while, doing whatever it is jelly does... Y'know if you needed somethin', you could've just come to see me in person.

No. In fact, er, I... am not really in the condition to go anywhere at the moment.

...You can talk. Whatever kinda state yer in, that's probably better than being a melted ice cream stain.

... I am not so sure about that.

[There's a pause as Greed decides how worked up to let himself get. There's still no certainty it's something serious, much less something out of his own range of abilities. He snorts a laugh and shrugs it off.] I don't think it's the case but do you need me to come kick somethin's ass for ya?

Actually... What I need is... advice.

Heeeeeh. Well, hit me! I'm secretly kind of a genius, y'know!

[When Shelly is asking Greed for advice, it HAS to be serious.] Well, you see... I seem to be suffering from, ah... cutaneous... oversensitivity. Or, er, I suppose it could just as well be nervous, but I am not even in the condition to seek medical attention, frankly...

Cutaneous oversensitivity, eh? [He makes it sound familiar, like a problem every man's had at some time or another.] ..... ..... [He covers the receiver, but can still be heard asking the patrons over at the bar.] Oi! Someone get me a definition of Cutaneous!

It relates to the skin, Mr. Greed.

Oh.

Sounds painful.


[He hesitates--] Er. Oh, oh yes. Of course. [Perhaps "painful" isn't the best word for it...] Anyway, I was wondering what I might... do. I have already tried taking a cold shower, but it was not... well... it... did not help, exactly.

Why're you doin' it all indirect like that? You're not at the age where it can just keep springin' back up for another round over and over no more, y'know. I bet you could get a TKO in one go. Definitely in three.

W-What are you--?! [A meow is heard close by. Like, "pretty much under the receiver and probably touching Shelly's legs" close by.] ... Ihavetogo!

--Waitwaitwaitwait! You think I'm about to let a cat be the one to do you in like that?! You're MY butler, damn it! Just hold on and I'll be over there to make sure this gets done right!

[Alas, Shelly has already hung up.]


((OOC: A-ALSO IF YOU TAGGED ME IN THE CR MEME I WILL GET TO IT VERY SOON I SWEAR ;;;))